By Mark Waid (writer), Zeb Wells (writer), Barry Kitson (art), Mark Farmer (art), Todd Nauck (art)
The week’s hottest title might just be the worst comic you pick up in 2009. To Marvel: Props to you on capitalizing on the upcoming innaguration event, and in convincing people to line up for this “hot” garbage. First and foremost, the cover is misleading to potential new readers. There are two stories in the issue. The first one, an easily forgettable Spider-Man story where there really is no story, but more of a pathetic character study of Peter Parker told by Betty Brant. The second, a 5-page story that features Spidey and someone that looks nothing like our new President.
The first story is a complete waste of time, offering nothing exciting nor anything important. It’s really disappointing, Waid. Your portrayal of Peter Parker as the geeky, likable, loyal friend, does not offer anything compelling to the character. Instead, you give us a douchebag Peter Parker that talks as if he’s got some messed up hormonal condition, where he has never sounded so soft up until this issue. Here are some of the lines that come out of the Peter Parker that some people thought you would like to read: ” You look redonkulous. And not the good kind of redonkulous.” “Tell your friend, night-night.” “No one hates you, sweetie.” WTF?! And by the way, take the pink out of the caption box, and you won’t read a difference from Parker’s voice to Betty Brant’s.
As for the Barack tale, Zeb Wells and Todd Nauck give you nothing but 5 pages of Spider-Man standing next to some black guy. Biggest highlight in the story? You wondering if Spidey and the awkward terrorist fist jab between him and the President is racist. Ditch this piece of shit. I’m sorry if you had to call x number of comic stores for this book, and ask your hot female friend who lives 18 miles away, to pick it up for you. But if you really need to see what all the hype is about, save yourself the time and money, and find it somewhere online. And for the record, I generally don’t like to encourage piracy, considering it forces the publishers to raise the price on our books. However, I’m making an exception for this one. Besides, Marvel already got what they wanted with this book.
Grade: F
-Raymond Hilario
Filed under: Marvel Comics Tagged: | Spider-Man
I respectfully disagree with the review. I find the break from the past two issues refreshing, and while I follow the new series only in sporadic episodes, I feel that you didn’t do this issue justice. The portrayal of Parker as a nervous, slightly cheesy character is just a break in tradition from the usual. Now, granted, some dialogue could have been edited out to no one’s great dismay, but the issue is told from Betty’s perspective, and her take on Parker could well be different than a passive narrator or Parker’s take on Parker.
As for the Obama story, there is little worth redeeming there, and the situation could definitely have been better executed, but it does what it set out to do, and that is pay homage to a president who collected comics. Not defending the lack of a quality story, but it is an attempt in earnest, and is still worth at least one read for people to judge it on its own merits. Besides, Parker’s musings to himself are comedic enough to elicit some laughs, and the secret service weren’t doing their jobs right if something like this could happen. I found the situational humor quite sound, even if the jokes came off as cheesy or the dialogue as contrived in parts.
Ray– You forgot to mention that Spidey was fighting a complete Lex Luthor look alike, total rip-off.
So, Spidey throws him head first into a wall, then this guy is still fine. Then, Spidey webs him in the face and makes a joke about the guy not having a helmet.
It was kinda like Mark Waid was like, “Wait a sec, that guy just went head first through a wall without a helmet. That doesn’t make sense that he should still be OK. But, I’ve already scripted out this scene. Crap! Oh, well. I’ll just through that helmet joke in at the end of the scene and we’re good.”
Really, this one-shot was really a waste. Who was it geared to? Teenage girls? Emo-men? I never understood why we should care about a Superhero’s social life. Marriages and family ties are compelling and can make for good stories. Clicks and platonic relationships are dead-on-arrival.
I didn’t even bother reading the Barak part.